Are You Tired of Doing Life Together?

Doing life together. It’s the ubiquitous Christian phrase used to express the idea that we don’t just go to church together, but that we share meals, fun, struggles, and joys. Doing life together is used to describe camping trips, backyard cookouts, and all kinds of other fun things!

Are you tired of doing life together? As Christians, we know we're supposed to be in community, but it can be really tough!

Side note: Have you heard of Jon Acuff? He’s one of my favorite authors. If you’re okay with a little snark, you should check him out. Here’s his post on this phrase: Doing life together. 

As Christians, we’re encouraged to live in community. To share our hearts and lives with each other. The encouragement usually comes with a great story of a fun time had by all. If the phrase shows up in a video at church, everyone on screen will be smiling and laughing. Doing life together can definitely be fun. But y’all…if we do this right, it’s also really hard.

Problems

You know why? Life isn’t easy. There’s nothing easy about doing life with someone who only has a few months left to live. It’s not easy to comfort a friend whose son is gripped by addiction or a friend who just miscarried her baby. But it’s worth it, friends, and it’s the heart of God.

Another reason this whole “doing life together” thing isn’t easy is because people suck sometimes.

Yep, that’s right. You do and I do. It’s why God had to send his precious son to die for us.

People will let you down. They might misunderstand your words and your heart. They might not appreciate your effort or sacrifice. (I have been guilty of these. How about you?)

Are you tired of "doing life together" with other Christians? We know we're supposed to live in community, but it can be really tough!

The truth is…

Do you ever get tired of doing life together? Do you ever think it’d be easier just to live in your own little bubble, disconnected from other Christians? I’ve thought that before too.

The truth is, how we feel about it doesn’t matter. We are commanded to love one another with the kind of love that lives up close…

By this all people will know that you are my disciples if you have love for one another. John 13:35

In fact, Jesus prayed for us to be ONE. He wants us to be as close to each other as he is to the Father:

I do not ask for these only (Jesus’ twelve disciples), but also for those who will believe in me through their word (us), that they may all be one, just as you, Father, are in me, and I in you… John 17: 20-21a

He’s also commanded us not to give up:

Let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap if we do not give up. So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith. Galatians 6:9-10

To do anything less than live life with other believers is disobedient.

Jesus’s example

Jesus modeled this for us. He did life with guys who doubted him, missed his point most of the time, and denied knowing him.

He loved long and he loved through. He moved toward the mess, not away from it. That’s what we have to do too!

Jesus loves long and he loves through. He moves toward the mess, not away from it. Click To Tweet

The only way we can do this is to lay aside our fleshly objections and set our eyes firmly and constantly on Jesus:

…let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross… Hebrews 12:1-2

We can endure all things, including messy people and messy situations, for the one who endured the cross for us. Amen?

And we might even get to have a little fun in the process…


What’s the hardest part about doing life together with other Christians? How do you think we can do it well?

11 thoughts on “Are You Tired of Doing Life Together?

    1. Yes. I think there are a lot of Christians in that category. I am blessed by a church and small group that take this part of discipleship very seriously!

  1. Wow, I love this post! It’s definitely not what I was expecting from the title, but I really relate to the message, as someone that likes to be fiercely independent. Really enjoyed this, thanks for sharing! 🙂

  2. Oh Beka, this was so convicting to me! I do want to hide and pretend that I’m the only one in the world right now. I know it’s not the RIGHT thing to do, but it’s what I want. Because people scare me right now. People always let us down, and I don’t feel like I can take any more of that… but it’s not about me. Jesus did it. Your point about how he loved His disciples hit me right in the heart!!! Thank-you for this post. As one who is striving to be like my Lord, I needed exactly the point that you made. I am praising Him for you right now and the way He is using your obedience for His glory. Keep up the good work, friend!

    1. Thank you!! I echo all of your sentiments about people. “People-ing” is too hard sometimes! It’s hard to allow ourselves to be disappointed, because that’s what will inevitably happen at some point. We’re all flawed sinners. The point about the disciples was inspired by a sermon series at my church. It hit me right in the heart, too!! I am thankful for YOU! At some point, our paths have to cross in real life!

  3. Doing life together can be incredibly hard! I’m a Christian mental health therapist so I do life with multiple people a week dealing with the hardships life has dealt them. The biggest challenge I see is making sure that in doing life together you are also taking the time to replenish alone with God. Jesus made the ultimate sacrifice of doing life together by giving His life. But He also took time to be alone with God! Otherwise we become too depleted and no longer are in a place to give and share! Thank you for the post! God bless and have a wonderful weekend!

    1. This is an important point! I’m so glad you added it to the discussion; thank you!! As an introvert that should’ve been one of the first things I thought to include!

  4. I used to be such a friendly person filled with humor, then a family member and close friend suddenly left me in my deepest need about 2 years ago. I needed to survive somehow ,so put on this safe distance with everyone.
    But your post that God moved through the mess, and not away ;that he still walked with the one who betrayed HIM is so convicting.
    I want to do life together with fellow Christians.
    Thank you for this post, Beka 🙂

    1. It’s so hard to open our hearts again to anyone after pain like that. Boundaries are good and healthy. The issue is when we (I do this too!) put up the same boundary for everyone whether they’ve hurt us or not. Concerning your close friend’s betrayal- I don’t believe that forgiveness always has to mean reconciliation. God has to direct us through that process. He is our greatest defender!

  5. I have so been there before. Just wanting to live in my own little bubble. Tired of “Doing Life Together”. I needed to read this today because sometimes I find myself pulling away from people and opting out of Doing Life Together. Thank you for this!
    Blessings,
    Faith <3

I'd love to hear your thoughts. Please leave a comment below!