I’ve been pondering how to write this without sounding like I’m fishing for validation. I’m really not! This post is actually an artifact of acceptance. It’s meant to encourage others who, like me, have found themselves wishing away their purpose.
To all the not-fun friends,
We know who we are, even if we don’t always like it. We are the ones who perceive what is not seen and hear what’s not said. The ones who would rather bypass small talk and cut straight to the heart. The ones who often feel like we don’t quite fit.
We have a special place in this world.
No, it may not be on the smiling galleries of Facebook and Instagram. It may not be on the invitation list for elite social gatherings. Or it may be. We can find ourselves in many places, busy with many activities, surrounded by many friends. Yet “fun” would be way down the list of words our friends would use to describe us. Instead we’re often described as:
For a long time I fought against this truth and tried to be something I’m not. But here it is…
I’m not a fun friend.
Oh, I have plenty of fun! I love to go with friends to festivals, fairs, concerts, parks, and other events. But there’s no inherent fun in this girl. I’ll never bring the party with me…and I’m finally okay with that.
A not-fun friend isn’t necessarily boring. It just means that we’re more likely to be reflective than lighthearted. We have a great sense of humor, but we’re not usually the ones telling the jokes. We’re the ones laughing, not causing the laughter.
When people classify friends, we can often feel like nobody’s best, but everyone’s great.
Yes, we not-fun friends have a special place in this world. God has uniquely gifted us to be helpers, ministers, and encouragers. We enjoy the mountaintops, but we shine in the valleys. We see friendship as ministry.We enjoy the mountaintops, but we shine in the valleys. Click To Tweet
I encourage you not to run from this truth, but to embrace it! Don’t wish away your purpose. There are plenty of people to laugh with; our friends also need someone to cry with. Someone to encourage them through their doubts. Someone to reassure them through their fears.
We are the sharpeners spoken of in Proverbs 27. We are the encouragers from 1st Thessalonians 5. We are the ones who help our friends up in Ecclesiastes 4 and the ones who spur them on in Hebrews 10.
Fun friends can also be all of the things above! We need fun friends, too. We love our fun friends. We’re different than you, though, and we need to know that’s okay.
So, to all the friends who have identified with this post, you are needed in this world. Your particular brand of friendship is necessary and important. God knew what he was doing when he made you. You are not less than. He didn’t accidentally leave out the parts that would have made you more charismatic, sociable, or witty. He created your personality, partnered it with your gifts, and sovereignly placed you in this time and place in history for his kingdom’s purposes.
That is awesome, my friend!! Even if no one would call us fun.